Model
Show your child what you expect. When you are at the table, tell dad that you would like the peas, salt, or juice. Your child will see you using words like please, thank you, peas, salt, juice, and dad. He or she will start to make associations with all of these vocabulary words. As you pick up something, repeat the word. Cup, remote, juice, fork, spoon, bowl, chicken, or whatever you have can help them learn more vocabulary.
You can start doing this with a baby. I know a dad who started saying right foot and left foot when he would put his child’s shoes on her. She has Down syndrome. At four, she knew right and left. Many of her peers did not know this. Dad gave her the vocabulary early. He modeled right and left from the day she came home.
Make Learning Fun
Make mistakes and laugh at yourself. Do not make your toddler feel overwhelmed if he or she makes a mistake. If you are teaching manners after burping, you may have to have a burping contest just to demonstrate. You may also have to demonstrate coughing in your elbow or other bodily functions. Let your kids know that while there is a polite way to respond, you are not so uptight that no fun is to creep into life.
Accept Their Feelings, but Give Consequences
Tell your children that it’s okay to be sad, mad, hurt, or any other emotion. I often say, “Well, you can be mad if you need to, but we do not hit our friends.” I am not discounting the anger. Mad is an acceptable emotion, but the behavior is not. Then you must give the consequence. “Since you decided to hit your friend, you are going to sit in time out for two minutes.